An Affair to Remember

Yesterday was one of the two days any 9-5 (well, 7 in my case) worker bee looks forward to every month. Yep, payday! So to treat myself but still not break my anti-splurging rule, (cause somebody got carried away last time buying 3 pairs of shoes,) I decided to visit Book Sale at the local mall near my office. I treated myself to an issue of Nylon which surprisingly came dirt cheap, and two issues of Vogue which featured two of the actresses I like, the juicy Blake Lively and the sensuous Rachel Weisz.  

Blake Lively for American Vogue

Photographed by: Steve Meisel

I've only browsed the American Vogue so far which I got only because I stumbled upon the issue's fashion spread which had this: 

(I got reprimanded the other day for wearing shorts to work. 

One of these days I'm gonna knock their socks of by wearing something like this to work. 

Ah, shall reserve further rant for another post)

But before I further get side tracked, what prompted this entry is an article called "An Affair to Remember" which was an article about life after divorce. It was almost like a classic case of a break up, with a third party involved, but less cruel and more romantic (if there is such a thing) than the average everyday infidelity case. 

Well, without further ado, I bring to you some excerpts:

"I think he fell in love with someone better suited to him and went for it. it was a bold move. Brazen. Who leaves their family? Who leaves their perfectly nice, perfectly smart mother of his children? Who dares to break the norm? It broke apart our family. It ruined happiness."

"It was painfully easy to see when your husband is in love with someone else. One day in late September I caught them having tea and discussing her work. Though they weren't lying naked in bed, there was an undeniable intimacy between them. "

"I'm sorry, he said. He looked at me, and it was that look. The look of someone who is hurting you, but who also loves you. Its the look that keeps me from hating him even though that's what you're supposed to do when your husband leaves you. I just think life is complicated and people are so different and incomprehensible. He didn't want to hurt me, he didn't want to hurt the children, but he was doing it anyway for reasons I still don't fully understand. "

"I believe in love. I believe in hard times and love winning. I believe marriage is hard. I believe people make mistakes. I believe people can make two things at once. I believe people are selfish and generous at the same time.  I believe very few people want to hurt others. I believe that life can surprise you. I believe in happy endings. "

"When you have children and your husband leaves you, two things happen: You become a mess and the strongest woman alive at the same time."

What the author went through gave me the image of painstakingly building a tower of cards, only for it to be tumbled down by a friendly gust of wind. Life is unpredictable like that. But what matters is not how long it takes for you to put the tower of cards back together but the willingness to do it all over again. 

In the end, after struggling for acceptance, the author found happiness in the form of another divorcee and made a new life. She, together with her two sons from her first marriage and her new spouse and his daughter make a family of five.  To this day, the author remains in good terms with her husband and his new spouse. 

Just like Love, Forgiveness can happen and people move on. Every house is a universe, and a family, a new culture all on its own.

And before I end this post, I shall impart you with these thoughts:

"I'd rather light a candle than curse the darkness"

-Adlai Stevenson