Sunday Afternoon Nostalgia

The weather reminded me of you today, and feelings I thought were long forgotten.

Sunday afternoons were one of my favorites then. Only because Sunday meant tomorrow is Monday (and as much as I cringe at the memory), Monday was my favorite day. Monday meant the start of the 5 days I get to see you after the day is through. Week by week, you made me fall in love, in tears, in small smiles, in the giddy feeling a mere sight of you gives. I just could not get enough.

But life continues and we move on. My fixation for you slowly diminished. Every once in a while I would still hear something about you, and I would always still smile of fondness. Your memories now remind me of how easy it is to fall in love with an idea. For that was really all there was. It was not really you that I fell in love with, but the idea of you that I have in my head. I guess I can always credit my folly to my youth and vanity. But I refuse to write you off as a mere illusion nor taint your memory with regret. The you that I fell in love with might only be born out of my ideals, but it doesn't make how I felt any less real.

It is so deceivingly easy to mistake infatuation and severe fondness for love. But I guess if I can still remember the feelings I felt towards you then as sharply as I do now, maybe, just maybe, it might have been love after all...

ALOHA!

By next week, I would be flying to Osaka to stay with my family for a month. Lately, I've been busy with tying loose ends to ensure everything is well before I leave. Getting the pieces I need for spring, seeing all of my friends (a lot of whom I haven't seen in a while), and sadly, leaving my job permanently. 

I believe we get in life what we have the courage to ask for. Sometimes though, we are required to make a decision to choose which we want more; occasionally, we come to a point in our lives where we question ourselves what we are willing to sacrifice in order to achieve our desires. 

As I bid my company farewell, I welcome with open arms Osaka and the new adventure that awaits!

So farewell, HIP; Hello, Osaka!

Just Do It :)

clickety click: who do you think you are?

My results:

Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:
You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

hushhh!

i wish i was blind sometimes
or deaf
then maybe it would spare me
from the sights i would rather not see
or words i would rather not hear
i value i have the gift of senses
but sometimes, just sometimes,
the promise of blissful ignorance
is oh so tempting

have you ever accidentally stumbled upon something
which you wish you didn't?
only, its too late too turn back
your curiosity is already one step ahead of you
and before you even realize,
Pandora's box has already been opened.

"curiosity killed the cat, but the cat has nine lives"

on repeat: vanilla twilight

So my friend Jak recommended Owl City to me way back 

but it took time before he grew on me. 

So now after browsing Owl City's discography,

here's what caught my ears:

off the same album as Fireflies, Ocean Eyes:

Vanilla Twilight

The stars lean down to kiss you,
And I lie awake I miss you,
Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere.
Cause I'll doze off safe and soundly,
But I'll miss your arms around me
I'll send a postcard to you dear, 
Cause I wish you were here.

I watch the night turn light blue, 
But it's not the same without you, 
Because it takes two to whisper quietly, 

The silence isn't so bad, 
Till I look at my hands and feel sad, 
Cause the spaces between my fingers
Are right where yours fit perfectly.

(these are the lyrics which caught my ears

and made me look at the title of the song from iTunes

cheesy ain't it?)

I'll find opposing new ways, 
Though I haven't slept in two days, 
Cause cold nostalgia chills me to the bone.
But drenched in Vanilla twilight, 
I'll sit on the front porch all night, 
Waist deep in thought because when I think of you.
I don't feel so alone.
I don't feel so alone.
I don't feel so alone.

As many times as I blink I'll think of you... tonight.
I'll think of you tonight.

When violet eyes get brighter,
And heavy wings grow lighter,
I'll taste the sky and feel alive again.
And I'll forget the world that I knew,
But I swear I won't forget you,
Oh if my voice could reach back through the past, 
I'd whisper in your ear, 
Oh darling I wish you were here.